Uncle Dennis Birthday is a Big Dill!

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[Intro] Yo, somebody call Venice, spread the word around, Uncle Dennis is SEVENTY-FIVE — and he still runs this town! From the garden to the Gulf, from the kitchen to the grill, Everybody knows Uncle Dennis… HE’S THE BIG DILL! [Verse 1] Seventy-five years young, and he’s still got game, Down in Venice, Louisiana, everybody knows his name! A husband and a father, grandpa, brother, friend, If something needs fixing, Dennis does it in the end. There ain’t much this man can’t cook, catch, grow, or do, And if Dennis doesn’t know it — well, that’s probably something new! He’ll lend a helping hand and show you all his skills, But when it comes to that garden… GOOD LORD, LOOK AT THOSE DILLS! [Chorus] He’s the BIG DILL, baby, seventy-five! Catching fish and growing veggies, keeping Venice alive! Red snapper start shaking, grouper head for the hills, When they hear that boat coming — “OH LORD, IT’S BIG DILL!” He can hunt, he can fish, he can cook, he can grill, Make a batch of crawfish that’ll give your belly a thrill! From the Gulf to the garden, everybody knows the deal, At seventy-five years old — UNCLE DENNIS IS THE BIG DILL! [Verse 2 — The Garden] Now let’s talk about the garden, ’cause the rumors are true, He grows tomatoes and peppers and some monster cukes too! The neighbors come around just to stare through the fence, Saying, “How does Dennis grow ’em? It just don’t make sense!” His vegetables are legendary, the biggest ever seen, Everything he grows is gigantic and green! And somebody always says — you know somebody will — “Have y’all SEEN the size of Dennis’s cucumber?!” Bobbie rolls her eyes like, “Lord, here we go…” After all these years together, she already knows! She’s a special kind of woman, patient, loving and sweet, ’Cause living with Uncle Dennis has GOT to be a feat! [Verse 3 — Ladies’ Man] And Dennis has a talent nobody can explain, Certain kinds of ladies seem to call his name! Maybe it’s the charm, maybe that seventy-five-year glow, But wherever Dennis travels… THE LADIES SEEM TO KNOW! One woman took one look and nearly made us all fall, When she gave Uncle Dennis the compliment of them all: “He looks so good, I’d eat him — yes, ma’am, I surely would — LIKE A PEANUT BUTTER AND JELLY SANDWICH… MMM-MMM GOOD!” Bobbie said, “Excuse me?! That man belongs to ME!” Dennis just kept smiling like, “What can I say? I’m seventy-three…” Wait a minute, Dennis — YOU’RE SEVENTY-FIVE! And apparently the PB&J market is still alive! [Verse 4 — Gulf Legend] Red snapper know his number, grouper know his face, When Dennis hits the Gulf, there’s panic every place! The fish send out a warning: “Everybody swim away!” “Dennis launched the boat — we’re gonna lose somebody today!” He can hunt, he can fish, boil crawfish by the sack, And once Uncle Dennis starts cooking, everybody’s coming back! His pickles are famous, his cooking’s the deal, If Dennis grew it, caught it, or cooked it — YOU KNOW IT’S GONNA BE REAL! [Bridge — The Dentist] Now Dennis was a dentist, fixing every smile, Working on those teeth for quite a long while. But dentistry was his trade — it was never his whole life, His treasures are his family, his friends, and Bobbie his wife. A father, grandfather, brother and friend, The kind of man you know you can count on till the end. If you need some help, Dennis is ready and willing — Especially if it involves something HE ALREADY KNOWS HOW TO DO BETTER THAN YOU! [Final Chorus] 🎵 He’s the BIG DILL, baby, seventy-five! Still fishing, still cooking, still keeping the party alive! He’s got giant cucumbers and legendary skills, The king of the garden — THE LORD OF THE DILLS! From Bobbie and the family, from your friends far and near, We’re raising up a glass to seventy-five incredible years! May the fish keep biting and your garden grow still, ’Cause Venice, Louisiana knows… UNCLE DENNIS IS THE BIG DILL! [Outro — Spoken] Happy 75th Birthday, Uncle Dennis! May your snapper be red, May your grouper be big, May your crawfish be spicy, May your garden keep growing… And may Bobbie continue to have the patience OF AN ABSOLUTE SAINT! And Dennis… at seventy-five years old, if women are still comparing you to a peanut butter and jelly sandwich… YOU’RE DOING SOMETHING RIGHT! HAPPY BIRTHDAY, BIG DILL!