Not Your Mirror

Songtext

[Verse 1] You kept my name inside a kitchen drawer Beside the keys and unpaid bills I learned your face from every photograph But not the reasons for your silences You said I had your restless hands Your habit of leaving lights on late I wore those little pieces like a coat While you kept hiding where they came from [Pre-Chorus] I asked you once, you changed the subject Asked again, you called it love How can a truth be mine to carry If you never gave me enough? [Chorus] You made me a copy of the girl you used to be Then blamed me for the parts you wouldn't let me see I was reaching through your history, trying to find my own You built me from a secret and left me there alone Mother, I am not your mirror Mother, I am not your ghost If you loved me, why'd you keep me From the person I needed most? [Verse 2] I found your old coat in the hall A train ticket stitched into the seam A photograph with someone's hand Resting gently on your knee You looked so young, you looked so certain Like the world had made a place I hated that I knew you better From the stranger in that frame [Pre-Chorus] You said the past was just a locked room Said the key would hurt us both But every door you shut between us Turned my questions into stones [Chorus] You made me a copy of the girl you used to be Then blamed me for the parts you wouldn't let me see I was reaching through your history, trying to find my own You built me from a secret and left me there alone Mother, I am not your mirror Mother, I am not your ghost If you loved me, why'd you keep me From the person I needed most? [Bridge] I can forgive the years you were afraid I can't forgive the way you made me wear your face I can keep the blood, release the blame Take back every borrowed shape You are more than what you buried I am more than what you made Say the truth before it hardens Say it now, before I walk away [Final Chorus] You made me a copy of the girl you used to be But I am done repeating what you wouldn't name for me I was reaching through your history, now I know my own You gave me all your fragments, but I won't live as stone Mother, I am not your mirror Mother, I am not your ghost I can love you without becoming The secret you loved most [Outro] I can love you without becoming The secret you loved most