Lyrics

[Intro – Caleb, nervously]
Yo, Mac... uh, something ain’t right in this diner,
That lady talkin’ ‘bout cobbler like a funeral reminder.
And Ms. Mae’s gravy just blinked at me twice...
Man, I didn’t sign up for this witch-hunting life!

[Verse 1 – Mac, voice of a man who just wants to eat]
Tuesday lunch, sweet tea in my glass,
Chicken on the plate, peace at last.
But nah, witch vibes creepin’ like smoke,
Gap-tooth grin and a laugh like a choke.

Christina’s at table seven, stirrin’ her gumbo,
Eyes twitchin' hard, sayin’ “I know, I know.”
Wavin' at spirits, talkin’ to spoons,
Hummin’ somethin’ wicked like a doomsday tune.

[Hook – Group chant, anthem-style]
🎵 All I want is a plate and a bite,
No broomsticks crashin’ through my light.
No curse in the crust, no spell in my grits,
I’m too old to fight, I’m too full for this!
But if she cackles, I’m crackin’ the code,
Mac still hunts even in lunch mode.
Fried chicken sacred, don't test my pitch—
Why we gotta fight another damn witch?! 🎵

[Verse 2 – Christina, taunting, wild]
Oh Mac, baby, I knew you’d see me,
Fried-day spell got you wishin’ you could flee me.
Gap in my teeth, that’s a soul-trap smile,
Been hexin’ fools since the river ran wild.

I serve cobbler with a side of chaos,
Sugar and screams, better say your way-offs.
Your apprentice green, that boy smell like fear,
Whisper in his ear, and I’ll disappear. Poof.

[Bridge – Caleb, panicking slightly]
Mac, the forks movin’, napkin just hissed,
Christina just winked and I swear I got dissed.
Can’t we just eat? I’m beggin’ you, bro—
This sweet tea ain’t sweet no mo’.

[Verse 3 – California Kyle, breezy entrance]
Yo, yo—what up, y’all? I’m just passin’ through,
Smelled that fried chicken, thought I’d grab a few.
Saw a gap-tooth lady and a dude with a blade...
Where’s the cat? No really—y’all seen it? It strayed.

[Beat drops – silence – then Mac speaks]

[Verse 4 – Mac, slow, low, deadly]
Kyle... go wait in the car.
This ain’t yoga and juice, this is war by the jar.
Christina, I’m tired. I ain’t got the thrill,
But I’ll end this spell while my tea still chill.

Been doin’ this dance since '63,
Saved this town, now let me eat in peace.
But nah, every time, same glitch, same stitch—
Tuesday lunch? Another damn witch.

[Final Hook – Whole crew, beat kicks heavy]
🎵 No peace for the southern hunter soul,
No napkin stays when the witches roll.
We got cobbler turnin’ hearts to stone,
Forks that scream when they’re left alone.

Chicken’s hot but the curse runs cold,
Witch in the room and she’s feelin’ bold.
So Mac stands up, dusts off his switch—
‘Cause even on lunch break...
He still hunts the witch. 🎵