This Train…

Lyrics

lonely, scared and anxious,
I try to pray.
they say I don’t believe but they don’t know me anyway…
nothing ever changes, trauma sticks around,
therapy it helps, but, I still often drown, in the weight of others expectations,
rules and regulations,
“you can’t make a song like that” says the overplayed radio station,
you’ll never get that fake voice of yours, in a regular rotation…
so this broken human being who can’t even scream when she’s in pain,
carries on through hatred, judgement and rain,
she builds her little family, with love like a little crane,
and we ride that love into tomorrow, like a barreling ole steam train…

clickety clack, oh clickety clack,
will we ever arrive at the end of these tracks?
will my life finally be one to live?
or will I be trapped within this?

the feeling of helplessness as one sits by a window,
wishing for a friend,
none ever show.
she contemplates,
maybe this is just the end…
she cries online,
unheard or accused lies,
never to find safety, a place to rest eyes…
watching over,
a few.
but where are they when the rain turns a dark shade of blue?
are they lost?
is the beacon burnt out?
or is it just me?
and how I meltdown and shout?
I hate autism,
I hate it so much,
it’s not a superpower,
and it really sucks…
all I want,
a safe home, safe people, and a god damned hug,
and all I’m ever gifted,
is a reminder that I’m an annoying little bug…
I used to love trains,
now I want off at the next stop…

clickety clack, oh clickety clack,
will we ever arrive at the end of these tracks?
will my life finally be one to live?
or will I be trapped within this?

ohhh

heyyy ohhh ohhh

ohhhh oh ohhhh oh

clickety clack, oh clickety clack,
will we ever arrive at the end of these tracks?
will my life finally be one to live?
or will I be trapped within this?