Jeffrey Is Important

Lyrics

Hello, Michael Pilgrim.
I am Gloria Filgrim.
I'm the sweaty niece of Peggy Wallace,
And good ol' Maurice says you should probably call us
If you're late on your lease, just like Jeffrey Walrus.
But Jeffrey just had a creamy fart.

Rub a rough tree for ten years of good luck.
Tell an old penis to get out of the truck.
Turn your vaginal trimmings into toupees for ducks.
Then pet a dragonfly.

Use sandpaper face wash when you are feeling down.
Slap the baby doctor on the other side of town.
Go to the Baptist church, and then burn it to the ground.
Then pet a dragonfly.

Hello, Michael Pilgrim.
I am Gloria Filgrim.
I'm the sweaty niece of Peggy Wallace,
And good ol' Maurice says you should probably call us
If you're late on your lease, just like Jeffrey Walrus.
But Jeffrey just had a creamy fart.

Buy a one-bedroom in the center of the sun.
Make a reservation for a table of one.
Use gasoline to clean the barrel of a gun.
Then pet a dragonfly.

Walk through a park naked as a Jay bird.
Squat near a bench, and take a big, smelly turd.
Tell whoever saw you do it, they are a nerd.
Then pet a dragonfly.

Hello, Michael Pilgrim.
I am Gloria Filgrim.
I'm the sweaty niece of Peggy Wallace,
And good ol' Maurice says you should probably call us
If you're late on your lease, just like Jeffrey Walrus.
But Jeffrey just had a creamy fart.