This one's for you, total stranger.

Lyrics

[Title: “This Is for You, Stranger”]
[Genre: Comedy Pop / Tom Cardy-core]
[Vibe: Obnoxious, smug, unnecessarily sincere auto-tuned falsetto]
[All stage directions and non-sung parts in brackets]


---

{Intro – spoken over loud subwoofer thump}
[Heard you were trying to pump gas in peace…
But guess what, baby? I brought the vibes.]

[Beat drops. Synth bass rattles like loose car parts]


---

{Verse 1}
🎶 I pull up to the pump with my windows down,
System so loud I could break your town.
I’m not in the car? Doesn’t matter, bro—
Gotta let the whole world know I listen to Flo Rida... ironically though. 🎶

[aggressive sub-bass drop, someone yelling "WHY THO?"]

🎶 Left my playlist on while I grabbed some gum,
It's my civic duty to bless your eardrums.
This beat slaps, your grandma weeps—
Even the raccoons are vibin’ in the trash heaps! 🎶


---

{Chorus}
🎶 THIS IS FOR YOU, STRANGER!
Yeah YOU, at pump four—
Tryna mind your business
While my bass shakes your core!
I’m doing it for the culture,
I’m doing it for the clout,
I’m doing it ‘cause silence is for losers
And I never had doubt! 🎶

Hold up... that was my car alarm.


---

{Verse 2}
🎶 I got EDM, trap, country rap fusion,
So loud it’s basically sound pollution.
Got four subwoofers and a fifth I built from spite—
My car stereo’s stronger than my will to be polite. 🎶

🎶 I’m not narcissistic, I’m just a giver,
Gifting free concerts by the gas pump river.
I see your baby crying? That’s tears of joy—
She’s blessed to be near a bass god boy. 🎶


---

[Bridge – whispered like it’s deep]
Music is my love language.
And you just got ear kissed.

[Auto-tuned echo: “YEAHHHHhhhHHHhhhhh”]


---

{Chorus – even louder and smugger}
🎶 THIS IS FOR YOU, STRANGER!
Feelin’ those vibrations?
That’s not an earthquake—
That’s just my good intentions.
I left my car unlocked,
My speakers unsupervised—
So you could experience
How awesome I am through your thighs. 🎶


---

[Outro – dramatic key change with gospel choir]
🎶 So next time you say “Who needs music this loud?”
Remember me: that legend, that dude, that crowd.
I'm the hero gas stations didn't ask for,
But got anyway...
On a Tuesday. 🎶

[Reverb: TUESDAAAAAAYYYY]