Lyrics

Re-write this and make it less serious and clearly a sarcastic satire

[INTRO]
Oh, gather ‘round, come lend an ear,
A tale of Philip, a man sincere.
With a healthy heart and a laugh so rare,
In his daily life, there's humor to spare.

[VERSE 1]
Philip rises with the break of dawn,
With the sun peeking through, he's already gone.
To the kitchen he goes with his sturdy plan,
A plate full of potatoes, that’s our Philip man.

[CHORUS]
Oh Philip, dear Philip, no room for mess,
He’s all about health, no time for excess.
Counting those carbs while making his calls,
He laughs to himself while chasing the falls.

[VERSE 2]
Strict schedules he keeps, and there's no debauch,
By ten PM, he's tucked in his watch.
No late-night snacks, just a heart that's kind,
A business-like humor that’s one of a kind.

[CHORUS]
Oh Philip, dear Philip, no room for mess,
He’s all about health, no time for excess.
Counting those carbs while making his calls,
He laughs to himself while chasing the falls.

[BRIDGE]
He starts group texts with a wink and a nudge,
While sending bargain pics, he won't budge.
“Look at this deal!” he’ll repeatedly boast,
But when he won’t explain, it’s like a ghost.

[VERSE 3]
In the aisle of the grocery with eyes so keen,
He finds treasures, he’s a discount machine.
To friends far and wide, he shares what he’s found,
No explanation given, just joy all around.

[CHORUS]
Oh Philip, dear Philip, no room for mess,
He’s all about health, no time for excess.
Counting those carbs while making his calls,
He laughs to himself while chasing the falls.

[HOOK]
So raise up a glass to this man we admire,
With potatoes and laughter, he’ll never retire.
For in every bargain, and each little jest,
Philip is living, he’s truly the best.

[OUTRO]
So here’s to Philip, both simple and spry,
With a heart full of laughter, he reaches the sky.
In the rhythm of life, he's the beat of the drum,
With potatoes and friendship, he's never alone.