Lyrics

[Verse 1]
I been bustin’ my balls, seven goddamn days,
While Austin’s off suckin’ vapes and sniffin’ praise.
Rollin’ in late with that squatted-ass ride,
Lookin’ like a cockroach tryin’ to drift side to side.

Truck lit up like a Mardi Gras whore,
But that Cummins ain’t seen a trailer or chore.
Chrome so clean but your brain’s so dead,
If dumb was a race, you’d be 10 steps ahead.

[Chorus]
Lazy-ass Austin, you useless prick,
Wouldn’t lift a tool but you sure lift d***.
You got Greg on the pontoon, suckin’ down beers,
Y’all playin’ hide-the-sausage while your wife’s in tears.
She’s beggin’ for a roof and a back porch too —
While you’re gettin’ pegged starboard under sky so blue.
Go ahead and float with your “fishing buddy” Greg,
We all know you ain’t out there huntin’ leg.

[Verse 2]
Your house fallin’ in and your gutters rot,
But you care more ’bout LEDs and TikTok clout.
That tailgate’s down more than your pants on the lake,
Got more lube in your boat than a porn outtake.

“Concrete this weekend” — bitch, you ain’t showin’ up,
Only mix you’ve touched is in a red Solo cup.
Your hands are softer than Greg’s inner thigh,
And you dodge more work than a methhead’s alibi.

[Chorus]
Lazy-ass Austin, you fuckin’ disgrace,
Your whole life’s a joke, and your truck’s a waste.
You’re a boardwalk bitch in lifted boots,
Just a poser in flannel with zero roots.
You got cum on your Cummins and glitter on the dash,
That’s not sawdust, bro — that’s drag queen ash.
Your woman’s home, mad and lonely as hell,
While you and Greg kiss goodbye at the gas well.

[Bridge]
We’re stackin’ bricks, you’re stackin’ excuses,
Too dumb for trades, too broke for deuces.
You’re the reason they laugh at small-town boys,
A big-talking dipshit with no real toys.

Cummins ain’t country, LEDs ain’t grit,
And that duck flappin’ on your hitch ain’t worth shit.
You’re all smoke and mirrors and TikTok views —
Tryin’ to be outlaw with your baby blue shoes.

[Final Chorus]
Lazy-ass Austin, pull your head from Greg’s lap,
Put down the vape, pick up a goddamn strap.
Build a porch, fix your roof, buy a clue —
Before your wife finds someone with balls and glue.
You ain’t a man, just a Myrtle bitch’s dream —
A plastic cowboy in a Red Bull meme.
I’ll be buyin’ my motor with blood and bone,
While you’re beggin’ for tips on your OnlyFans phone.

[Outro]
So ride off, Austin, in your rainbow glow,
Take Greg, take the boat, just f***in’ go.
Leave the real work to men who sweat,
While you and your boyfriend watch sunsets.