I screamed, I fucking pleaded
I even fkn prayed
just to hold you one more day
im lost, and afraid
what was good
now decayed
no good news that awaits
there’s no way to change our fate
no matter how much hope or faith
there’s no way to negate
how our lives will ultimately equate
can’t go back and clean the slate
do things different
to change your fate
your life for mine I would trade
a life without you I can’t take
and knowing that on our last day
we were up in each others face
u thought u Was getting played
that I was thirsty and I wanted to stray
the week after my daddy passed away
I got laid off work
bills were being unpaid
I didn’t want you to know
hence why I was so vague
on your mind the doubt it plagued
these thoughts ur mind enslaved
a split decision was then made
veered onto the tracks
head on with that freight
three years to this day
each year I dread the date
It’s me who paid the ultim-mate
this heart gone to waste
in this pain my guilt incased
in my tears there’s trauma laced
adds more layers
to this broken down place
small lies come with high stakes
oh you have no idea the ache
like each bone in my chest IT breaks
im not here but I’m awake
crying on the ground were you where laid
below me your body lies decayed
our favourite song is on replay
NOW IM JUST FKN BITTER
FILLED WITH HATE
FEELS LIKE IM DROWNING EVERYDAY
WHO NEEDS ENEMIES
WHEN ITS YOU THAT U HATE
CANT LOVE MYSELF
SO HOW COULD I BE YOUR MATE
IF I GOT NOTHING TO GIVE
THEN WHAT U GOT TO GAIN
WHEN YOUR KNOWN FOR CAUSING droughts
NO ONE EXPECTS U TO MAKE IT RAIN
NO ONE TURNS TO YOU FOR LOVE
WHEN ALL U GIVE IS PAIN
NO ONE SEES YOUR VICTORY
WHEN ALL YOU WEAR IS SHAME
LIKE POINTING THE FINGER
WHEN UR the one AT BLAME
it’s like finding life
in this pit of decayed
I JUST WISH SOMONE WOULD FKN PAY
TAKE IT OUT ON SOMONE I FKN HATE
JUST annihilate THERE FKN FACE
BLEED THEM OUT TO JUST A STAIN
ON THE PAVEMENT THIER LIFE IS SLAYN
SHIT WHY NOT LIFE HAS NO meaning
YOUR JUST LIKE ME but u can’t take a beating
now here you are screaming
like a weakling piss ant
pleading as ur screaming
like a pig ur just squealing
BLOOD ALL OVER THE CEILING
OF THIS CRIME THERES NO CONCEALINg GET THE BIN AND START WHEELING
CUT U INTO SECTIONS TO START FREEZING AS IM JAMMING AND SQUEEZING
AS UR BODY IS SEIZING
the stench is wreeking
SO I GIVE YOU A BLEACHING
CLOSE THE LID
DRIVE YOU OUT TO THE CLEARING
PUT MY HAND IN UR POCKET AND PULL OUT THIS LOCKET
AND THEN MY STOMACH FEELS KNOTTED
A PICTURE OF HIS KIDS OF WHO HE BESOTTED
THE WORDS I LOVE YOU ACROSS THIS PHOTO JOTTED
I feel so fkn rotten
this darkness I fear is growing
my demons are all showing
in my blood this evil flowing
so it’s best that I be going
load my gun
shoot my point blank
blowingout my brain
gun smoking
blood flowing
my heart rate slowing
the crows around me start crowing
the fear it starts growing
what happens next no way of knowing
can’t breathe start choking
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