Lyrics

[Verse]
I woke up at midnight, stumbled in the dark,
Half asleep, not thinkin', and missed my mark.
Sat down on that porcelain, got a cold surprise,
Lord, help me, it's a trap for my thighs.

[Verse 2]
He says he don’t mean it, "Just a harmless slip,"
But I’m tired of splashin’ water—losin' my grip.
You’d think by now he’d learn, after all this time,
But here I am yellin’, rearrangin' his crime.

[Chorus]
Dang it, put it down, don’t make me shout,
How hard can it be to figure that out?
It’s a two-second job, not a Herculean feat,
Just lower the lid when you finish your seat!

[Bridge]
I ain’t some high-maintenance fussin' kinda gal,
But I won't play roulette with that frigid pal.
If you aim and you miss, at least clean up the mess,
And don’t leave the throne lookin’ like a distress.

[Verse 3]
Every man thinks it’s funny, they just chuckle and grin,
Sayin’ "Why do you care if it’s up again?"
But next time they’ll find me, I’ll get my sweet revenge,
Glue that seat down tight with a twist or a wrench.

[Chorus]
Dang it, put it down, don’t make me shout,
How hard can it be to figure that out?
It’s a two-second job, not a Herculean feat,
Just lower the lid when you finish your seat!