Lyrics

Arjan woke up, said, "Hell, today’s the fuckin' day,
Gonna climb that wall, gonna make them bastards pay."
But his chest too wide, built like a goddamn tank,
Halfway up, that shitty rope snapped and sank.

Arjan, fuckin' Tarkan,
Chest so big, he's a legend, man.
Fell on his ass, smashed every bone,
But Arjan don't quit, he's hard as stone.

Lay there twisted, fucked up real good,
Doctor said, "Boy, you're built like fuckin' wood.
All your bones broke, cracked up and split,"
Arjan just laughed, said, "Doc, fuck that shit."

Arjan, badass Tarkan,
Chest so wide, battle-man with a plan.
Bandbox boss, fightin' through pain,
Bones snapped up, but he's back again.

Pop those pills, beer cold as hell,
Rollin' round town, givin' orders loud as hell.
No damn rope, no busted-ass bone,
Can stop Arjan from claimin' his throne.

Back at Bandbox, kickin' some ass,
Battlemanager swag, orthopedic badass.
Wide chest pumped, back on that wall,
No fuckin' injury gonna make him fall.

Arjan, tough-ass Tarkan,
Break all his bones, he's still the man.
Battlemanager king, yeah, fuckin' alive,
Arjan won't quit, he's born to survive.

So raise your beer, let's toast real high,
To Arjan fuckin' Tarkan, the chesty tough guy.
Next climb buddy, bring a rope that’s tough,
Cause Arjan’s chest is wide as fuck!