“LICENSE TO COACH”

Lyrics

Once you had your castle in the snow,
Mouse ears on the mantel, dreams in full glow
But the sky turned gray, and the calls came fast
From a man named John, with a future that doesn’t last.

Goodbye Rockies, hello debt
Trading vision for a quote-filled PowerPoint set
No missions, no spies, just five daily laws
And a script that says “fake it,” with enthusiastic applause

You had a mission, now you’re pitching
Climb the ranks while your soul’s twitching
From the Rockies to regret, in a three-step plan attack
With a license to coach—but no plan to come back
Oh, the name’s Consultant… Casual Consultant
You fell for the charm, and now you’re under contract

They promised the world… for a fee
Now you lead… from under your parents’ TV
Suit and tie, but no escape plan
Just a laminated badge and a bankrupt man

You had a mission, now you’re pitching
Sold your soul for life-coach fishing
From Colorado bold to a borrowed desk trap
You’ve got a license to coach—just no Bond-style map
The name’s Consultant… James Consultant
Shaken, not hired, and buried in the claptrap