Karen, Karen

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[Verse 1] Karen keeps a clipboard by the coffee machine Knows every rule and what every rule should mean She circles little errors in a red felt pen Then explains them to the manager again [Pre-Chorus] She says, “I’m only asking questions” With her sunglasses on indoors The whole room holds its breath a second When Karen reaches for the door [Chorus] Karen, Karen, take a number, take a breath You can’t turn a parking ticket into a federal test Karen, Karen, everybody knows your name You brought a ladder to complain about the picture frame [Verse 2] She wrote three pages on the lobby plant Said the leaves were making guests feel disenchanted She has a folder marked “Urgent, Part Two” And a whistle that she uses when the elevator’s due [Pre-Chorus] She says, “I’m only being helpful” While rearranging every chair Then signs her note in giant letters So no one misses that she’s there [Chorus] Karen, Karen, take a number, take a breath You can’t turn a parking ticket into a federal test Karen, Karen, everybody knows your name You brought a ladder to complain about the picture frame [Bridge] But late one night, the hallway broke The lights went out, the boiler smoked Karen found the fuse and called the crew She taped a sign up: “I fixed this too” [Final Chorus] Karen, Karen, take a number, take a breath You can’t turn a parking ticket into a federal test Karen, Karen, maybe we should say your name You brought a ladder, saved the building, then complained about the frame [Outro] She stamps the form and checks the time “Next complaint is mine.”