Lyrics

[Verse 1 – Nervous, friendly strum]
Walked in clean, shirt tucked neat,
Smiled too wide, forgot to breathe.
They hit me fast with question one:
“Name the seven principles…” — oh sh*t, I’m done.

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[Pre-Chorus – deadpan spoken]
My brain went full potato.
I nodded like I had something to say. I didn’t.

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[Chorus 1 – self-deprecating, melodic]
I gave them… one. Just one.
“Communication!” — and then I was done.
Blanker than the office biscuit tin,
Smiled like I was totally locked in.
They moved on fast, thank God above,
Still don’t know what the other six were made of.

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[Verse 2 – regaining form]
Next up: money — saving, making, flow.
I actually knew this one (sorta), so
I dropped “streamline,” “value,” “cutting cost,”
Pretended I knew what a margin lost.

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[Pre-Chorus – fake confidence rising]
I even said “return on spend”
Like I didn’t Google that in the car park ten minutes before.

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[Verse 3 – the horse-sized duck moment]
Then they hit me with a final curve,
A question that took a hell of a swerve:
“Would you fight a horse-sized duck or—” wait, what?
“A hundred tiny horses?” — I nearly forgot
Where I was or who I am,
So I said: “Mate, I’d run. No shame. No plan.”

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[Pre-Chorus – whispered]
But instead I smiled and said,
“I think I’d take the duck. Fewer legs to track.”

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[Verse 4 – back to the panic moment]
Then they circled back to question one,
Like they just remembered I’d massively flung
That list of seven — they gave me one more shot,
So I stood up straight… and gave it a lot.

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[Chorus 2 – triumphant, ridiculous, unforgettable]
“BRING THEM TOGETHER!” I shouted with might,
Like I was Moses mid-PowerPoint fight.
No one asked, but I gave it heat,
Dropped it like I’d just invented elite.
They paused, then nodded — God knows why —
And I nearly cried… but kept my tie dry.

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[Bridge – quiet and sweet, like a closing monologue]
We wrapped it up, I said my thanks,
Held in a fart, and avoided pranks.
I left unsure what I’d just said,
But I didn’t trip, and I wasn’t dead.

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[Final Chorus – callback with cheeky smile]
Gave them one, forgot the rest,
Made up a mantra and hoped for the best.
So if your brain gives in to weather…
Just yell with pride:
“BRING THEM TOGETHER!”

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[Outro – whisper fade]
Still don’t know what the seven are…
But I’ve got one. And that’s enough for now.