Lyrics

I wake up, stretch, crack my back—okay, that was new
Check my phone, group chat’s on fire, and guess who?
Seungmin’s at it again, calling me an old man
Says I should trade my sneakers for a minivan

I say, “I’m only 29, that’s still my prime”
But they laugh like I’m pushing 85
They’re out here running wild, making chaos every day
Meanwhile, I’m just tryna find my 401(k)

I’m not half of 60, I’m just 29!
I don’t need a cane, I’m doing just fine
You act like I’m ancient, but y’all need to grow
You’re kids to me, but I’m not that old!

They stay up ‘til 5, I’m asleep by 2
They drink like fish, I sip my tea and review
The list of all the times they called me grandpa today
If I had a nickel, I’d retire—oh wait...

I say, “I’m only 29, that’s still my prime”
But they laugh like I’m pushing 85
They’re all reckless, carefree, living without fear
Meanwhile, I’m Googling back pain and tax tiers

I’m not half of 60, I’m just 29!
I don’t need a cane, I’m doing just fine
You act like I’m ancient, but y’all need to grow
You’re kids to me, but I’m not that old!

Fine, call me grandpa, but remember one thing
When you hit this age, I’ll be laughing, believe me
And Seungmin, just wait, when you turn twenty-nine
I’ll remind you daily, ‘cause revenge takes time

I’m not half of 60, I’m just 29!
I don’t need a cane, I’m doing just fine
You act like I’m ancient, but y’all need to grow
You’re kids to me, but I’m not that old!

One day you’ll see, when you’re my age too
I’ll be there, calling you “grandpa” too
So go ahead, joke, have your fun today
But I’m still 29, and that’s all I’ll say!