Lyrics

(Verse1)
Patrick rode alone, in a wagon ’cross the plains,
If he’d only known, he’d have gone a different way.
Cuz hidin’ past the rocks, and the cacti everywhere,
He was shocked out from his socks by the bandits lurkin’ there.

(Verse2)
Their leader went by Ranger, and his band, The Chooroo Crew,
“Now listen up here, stranger, and do what we say to do.”
Pat reached in the wagon—and guess what he withdrew?
A brand new pack of Chooroos; now Pat’s leader of the crew!

(Chorus)
You won’t know the Highwaymen were here until they’re gone—
Packed all your gear and property in sacks and moved along.
Nothing left in place, no not a footprint left in sight,
Come morning, you will find the travel lighter than last night.

(Verse3)
Pat and Ranger rolled to town, on down to the Saloon,
Lookin’ for fish tacos and Meow Mix by the spoon.
But Scout and Madam Kelli blocked their access to the door,
“Ranger had his supper—he don’t get to have no more!”

(Verse4)
They tipped their hats and left, with empty bellies still in tow,
Scout pounced upon the Meow Mix, thinkin’ no one else would know.
Later that night, the saloon’s floors bore the grisly cost,
As Scout’s ill-gotten supper got both ill and promptly tossed.

(Chorus)
You won’t know the Highwaymen were here until they’re gone—
Packed all your gear and property in sacks and moved along.
Nothing left in place, no not a footprint is in sight,
Come morning, you will find the travel lighter than last night.

(Verse5)
Pat and Ranger stayed up late, makin’ songs and AI vids,
Laughin’ at the projects and at all the jokes they did.
Seven nights this week they’d stayed up and bounced around,
It left poor Kelli restless, and Scout wandering around.

(Verse6)
Now Kelli’s startin’ off her day, more tired than should be.
She knows an easy way to bring about a tranquil scene.
To stop the Highwaymen, you must lotion-up the ween,
It knocks their leader out, and puts the Highwaymen to sleep!

(Chorus)
You won’t know the Highwaymen were here until they’re gone—
Packed all your gear and property in sacks and moved along.
Nothing left in place, no not a footprint left in sight,
Come morning, you will find the travel lighter than last night.

(Bridge)
So if you hear them ridin’ in, the middle of the night,
These Highwaymen take what they need, then vanish in the night.
They’re sly and they’re clever, ya, their songs and vids kick ass
Lotion to the ween’s the trick to stop their leader fast.

(Outro)
Now Kelli’s found her quiet, Scout curls up on the bed,
While Pat and Ranger snorin’, to the songs inside their heads.

By dark they take what they can carry, then leave without a sound—
But sometimes they keep everybody up, stompin’ around.