
[Female sassy voice. High-energy pop-rock with attitude. Fast-paced drums, crunchy guitar, gang vocals in the chorus. Background chants in (parentheses). Sarcastic spoken parts in brackets.]
[Verse 1]
Oh, look whoâs here, itâs the Pee Patrol!
Lurking by the door like a creepy troll. (Not weird or aynthing đ)
Flashinâ your outrage, puffinâ your chest,
Who died and made you the toiletâs best?
Got no badge, got no clue,
But somehow think this jobâs for you?
Newsflash, buddy, hereâs the twistâ
The real freaks donât ask before they piss.
[Pre-Chorus]
No one called, no one cares,
But you're dragging people out of there!
Not a hero, not a saint,
Just a bigot on a power tripâainât that quaint?
[Chorus]
Bathroom Bouncers! Ainât it a trip?
Doinâ the most, but you ain't done shit!
Clockinâ gender, takinâ names,
But never once stopped a real damn threat!
Bathroom Bouncers! It's ass-in-ine!
Actinâ like youâre savinâ womankind!
Kickinâ out strangers like itâs your bizâ
Sit down, shut up, let people piss!
[Verse 2]
So tell me, champ, riddle me this:
Who are you âsavingâ with your fits?
Ainât it wild how you âprotectâ galsâ
From other men, yet not yourselves?
If dudes are the danger, take the hint,
Maybe check your own damn print.
Yet all your rage, all your mightâ
Somehow lands on folks who donât fight?
(Typical. đ)
[Bridge - Spoken, sarcastic]
Oh wow, how brave, how bold!
Tell me, hero, what were you told?
Did the secret council of public stalls
Declare you ruler of the bathroom halls?
(I dub thee....Champion of the toilet! Hahaha)
Or did ya just wake up one day
Decide to police where people pee?
Bravo, sir! A round of applause!
Too bad itâs all for a fake-ass cause!
[Final Chorus]
Bathroom Bouncers! Ainât it a trip?
Doinâ the most, but you ain't done shit!
Flexinâ hard, callinâ names,
But never once stopped a real damn threat!
Bathroom Bouncers! Its ass-in-ine!
Actinâ like youâre savinâ womankind!
Funny how the real danger you dismissâ
Sit down, shut up, let people piss!
[Outro]
Just sit down,
Shut up,
Let people piss.
Ainât nobody out here askinâ for this.
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