Bunker Pulse

Songtekst

[intro]Get ready for part 2 - early access collectors-edition… (BOOM!) [Verse] Adam popped the top on a tall-boy. (Psht) Lit up a small-joint, popped a Lucy and got ready for a long-voyage. (Time to game!) Easy-bet. Bout to game till he’s in a greasy-sweat like a sleazy-wretch. (Ha!) Booted up black-flag, it’s time to explore some deep-sea-wrecks. (Yeah!) Xbox controller… no clue why he doesn’t have a pee-sea-yet. (Man, what the fuck) But just as he was about to slip into a rift-in-time, his predictive-mind picked up on a cryptic-sign. Just then, the phone rang on his encrypted-line. It was his old mentor; a sixty-five year old Egyptian-scribe. Adam accepted the call and said “I told you I quit the game-dude. I tucked away the grey-suit after I paid dues.” The scribe said (“Adam, that’s fake-&-gay-news. You know if you don’t play the game, the game-plays-you. We got word Mossad had a scientific break-through. Their gene-splicing thing is already in phase-two. The lab is hidden under a trailer park with high-level-clearance. The place is crawling with Mossad ninjas who throw metal-spear-tips, genetically modified deer-ticks and several giant-earwigs.”) Adam said, “I told you I’m done! You know I’ve been put-through-hell” He tried to hang up and the scribe said (“Adam… they took-Michelle. Look-for-yerself”)” (what the fuck?!). He sent Adam surveillance footage of Michelle being pushed-in-a-cell! HE STOOD UP AND YELLED! (Crap, dude!) The scribe said (“the Israelis picked harmony & vince cuz the project needed matching-genetics. After several test-kits, they achieved test-tube conception, so the conception was sexless. But they still had sex, which was… weird. Anyway, to save Michelle and the human-race, You need to fight the Two Demons of the Cue-nuh-caves: Two trailer trash cannibals who feed on human-brains and fluid-waste. You’ll need to steal the keycard from them to get-through-the-base.”) Adam grabbed two-grenades, Already dripped out in his bullet-proof Jon-Wick-suit. It protects him from caustic-fumes and toxic-fruit. Ready to cock-and-shoot a modified Glock-so-huge it creates a sonic-boom. Don’t forget the ninja stars, plus the high-tech-katana sharp enough to dissect-a-llama. The scribe said (“Adam - the baby was spliced with salamanders from Uganda and a giant-piranha. Plus an undisclosed black guy that might-be-Obama…”) Adam hung up, ate a five-cheese-lasagna and grabbed the keys-to-the-Mazda. [bridge] So Adam’s Mazda moved fast-and-viscous. They created a baby slash fish, so Adam is back-in-business. They took his baby-back-bitch, so now it’s time to blast-these-niggez. [chorus] Piranha-boy cosmonaut. (“GUB-GUB~?”) His baby-bottles-topped-with-Molotov, plus he knows KRAHV-muh-GAH and his hide is hard-as-lava-rock. (“GUB-GUB~!”) Amphibious-death-machine. (“GOO-GOO GA-GA NEGGA!”) How could something so deadly be such-a-precious-thing? (“TEE-HEE~”) Trained in martial arts and grecko-Roman-wrestling. (“CHA-CHA MOO-TAKA-TAKA!) [Outro] Agent Adam is back-on-a-mission. Jon got too ambitious when he drafted-this-wishin’ he’d made the decision to scale-it-back-in -an-instant. But either way, get ready for part-three. Where adam settles his vendetta with a hard-Vee…