Controlled Chaos - JohnnieB

Lyrics

( Johnnie B On The Beat ) I took the pressure from my life and got a chemical rush, Put fire in the booth and watched the whole room combust. They keep acting like I’m wild when I’m focused as fuck, But I learned to move smooth when the road gets rough. So mom, I’m sorry if this music sounds dangerous, But I found peace inside the shit that was breaking us. I can’t promise every thought in my head stays hush, But I can promise I won’t fold when the weight gets crushed. I guess it’s my fault from the way I grew up, Had love turn fake, had trust turn dust. Had people say “I got you” then switch for the buzz, Now I keep my circle small when they swear it’s love. There’s too much fake concern, too much player-hate smoke, Too many people throw stones, then laugh when you choke. So I turned my own madness into rhythm and notes, Now every scar in my chest got a place in the flow. Even had to watch love turn into a trap, Had my heart moving forward while my mind looked back. Had the truth get twisted, had the blame get stacked, But I don’t need revenge, I put the pain on wax. Some out here judge me like they know what I’m made of, Like one dark bar means the whole man’s hateful. Bitch, I’m balanced, not broken, I’m painfully grateful, I took chaos by the throat and made that shit faithful. I already went down in my mind too deep, Had nights where I couldn’t even breathe in peace. But I came back sharper with the pen in reach, Now the same damn storm got a leash on me. Hook This is controlled chaos, Yeah, pressure made us flawless. Walking through the madness with the whole world watching, Best believe I turn the crash into profit. This is controlled chaos, Yeah, pain made me conscious. Dancing with the storm but I don’t let it stop me, Best believe I make the wild shit catchy. Because, bitch, this is controlled chaos. Verse 2 See, I gave my darker side a chance, then it tried to erupt, Tried to turn my whole brain into smoke and dust. Telling me, “Support your music,” then calling my bluff, Like I don’t know self-hate when it dresses like love. I’m making judgments based on what I lived through, Not just what I see, not just what I been through. I cuss because the truth got teeth when it hits you, And sometimes clean words don’t cut deep enough to fix you. They say, “JohnnieB’s negative,” but that’s what they focus on, They miss Big John praying when the night gets long. They miss the middle man trying to keep both strong, They hear one wrong note and ignore the whole song. It’s about time they see why I don’t trust quick, I seen smiles turn slick and love turn toxic. I seen peace get thin when the mood gets chaotic, So I built my own system and learned how to lock it. See, I’m also me when the bad thoughts rush, But I don’t let the mic or the moment bust. I don’t crash for attention, I adjust, I turn every damn spark into controlled disgust. Hating on myself almost made me blow up, Like a fuse in my chest had enough. But wait, why don’t they have more shit to say? Because I turned that same darkness into something I can trust. I’m the worst and the best in the same damn discussion, JohnnieB’s other side still causing disruption. But I don’t hide it, I use it for construction, Made a whole damn world from internal combustion. Can’t believe it was myself trying to set me up, All these wannabe versions trying to act tough. It’s a shame they only love when the dark side’s up, But the full JohnnieB never gave no fuck. Truth is, I got away from the lifestyle that dragged me, Got away from old habits that used to attack me. Took mud on my name and made roots underneath, Now I bloom through the dirt with a grin in my teeth. We tried our best through the shit and the flood, Had to dig through the doubt, had to crawl through the mud. But we both knew the old way wasn’t enough, So I turned controlled chaos into what I love. Hook This is controlled chaos, Yeah, pressure made us flawless. Walking through the madness with the whole world watching, Best believe I turn the crash into profit. This is controlled chaos, Yeah, pain made me conscious. Dancing with the storm but I don’t let it stop me, Best believe I make the wild shit catchy. Because, bitch, this is controlled chaos. Verse 3 I don’t need to be reckless just to feel alive, I got enough damn voltage running through my mind. I got enough old ghosts sitting in my spine, I got enough sharp truth cutting through each line. I’m not chasing the fall, I’m controlling the speed, Not chasing the rush, I’m controlling the need. Not chasing destruction, I’m planting the seed, Taking every bad impulse and making it bleed. That’s JohnnieB with the wheel in his grip, One hand on faith, one hand on the split. Big John says breathe when the rage gets lit, Little Johnnie says burn, but I manage that shit. I’m the calm in the sirens, the voice in the riot, The loud-ass truth they keep begging to quiet. The man who can snap but still choose not to try it, Th