Loud Old Toot

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[Verse 1] Met you by the bait shop, Friday afternoon You had a blue bandana and a little yellow moon I tried to say "howdy," tried to play it cool Then my stomach made a thunderclap right beside the fishing stool [Pre-Chorus] You turned around, I turned red There ain't no hiding what my belly said [Chorus] Girl, I fell for you with a loud old toot A barn-door rattler in my Sunday suit You laughed so hard you spilled your sweet tea Then you pulled up a chair and stayed right next to me I ain't proud of the timing, but honey, it's true That big ol' fart was the first thing I shared with you [Verse 2] We drove out past the pasture in your Chevrolet You had strawberry lip gloss, I had beans from yesterday I reached for your hand underneath the dash Then a low-down rumble made the windows flash [Pre-Chorus] You said, "Boy, was that you?" I said, "Ma'am, I confess" You said, "At least you're honest," and you kissed me nonetheless [Chorus] Girl, I fell for you with a loud old toot A backroad cannon in my cowboy boot You laughed so hard the dog woke up And I loved you more when you didn't give a— [Post-Chorus] Pardon my manners, pardon my pride That was a mighty gust I couldn't keep inside [Bridge] Now Sunday morning, coffee on the porch You wear my flannel, I wear my remorse You say, "Love ain't perfect, and neither are you" Then you lift one eyebrow like you know what I'm about to do [Break] [LOUD FART SOUND EFFECT] [Final Chorus] Girl, I fell for you with a loud old toot A porch-swing tremor in my Sunday suit You held your nose, then you held me close You're the country gal I love the most If romance is a dance, then I stumbled on through One loud little thunderclap straight into you [Outro] So here's my heart, and here's the truth I love you, darlin'—and I blame the barbecue [LOUD FART SOUND EFFECT]