Not him

歌词

Verse 1 Sometimes I catch myself looking At old pictures on your feed Seeing you standing there beside him Hits a place inside of me And I’ll admit I start comparing Wondering where I’ll ever stand I know the way he left you hurting I know he wasn’t a good man Still, sometimes I wish you loved me Like it looked like you loved him And I hate that I even wonder If I’ll ever measure up to it Pre-Chorus I know those memories came before me I know I can’t erase that pain But I wasn’t there when he broke your heart So don’t make me wear his blame Chorus Don’t make me pay for what he did Don’t let his shadow cover this He broke your heart, and that hurts me But there’s another side you don’t see Every time his name comes up Every story told again It leaves me wondering in silence If I’ll always come second to him Maybe those shoes are mine to fill Maybe I never really will I’m scared you loved him more than me And maybe always will But I’m not him I’m standing here Giving everything I can So don’t make me pay for another man Verse 2 I don’t think people understand it When they bring him up around me They know the damage that he did to you But not what hearing it does to me Because knowing someone hurt you Hurts me deeper than I show But hearing everything about him Makes me wonder what I’ll never know Was there something that you gave him That you’ll never give again? Did he take the deepest part of you And leave me what was left? I know that isn’t fair to ask you And maybe fear is talking too But sometimes I’m scared no matter what I give I’ll never mean that much to you Pre-Chorus And when those thoughts get in your mind I feel you changing right away You may not think I notice it But I see it every day Chorus Don’t make me pay for what he did Don’t let his shadow cover this He broke your heart, and that hurts me But there’s another side you don’t see Every time his name comes up Every story told again It leaves me wondering in silence If I’ll always come second to him Maybe those shoes are mine to fill Maybe I never really will I’m scared you loved him more than me And maybe always will But I’m not him I’m standing here Giving everything I can So don’t make me pay for another man Bridge I notice when your voice gets colder I notice when your eyes have changed I notice when you start to distance Even when you never say And every time you pull away A little part of me does too Not because I’m giving up I’m scared of losing me and you Everybody has a limit And I never want us there I don’t want resentment growing Where we used to really care If I wanted just to hurt you I’d have done it long ago I wouldn’t give my heart, my time My everything to watch it go Breakdown And baby, that rug beneath your feet Ain’t getting pulled away I’m not gonna make you trust in me Then turn around one day I’m not him I won’t fake forever I won’t disappear when things get tough But I need you to believe me Because love without trust ain’t enough Final Chorus Don’t make me pay for what he did Don’t let his ending become this He already took enough from you Don’t let him take away us too I don’t need to fill his shoes I just want my place with you I want to know the love we have Is something you believe in too And if our story ever ends I’ll cherish every single page Because you became the most important person That ever came my way But I’m not ready for that ending I’m not walking out today The rug ain’t getting pulled beneath you Baby, I’m here to stay. So when his name comes up again Just know there’s something you don’t see— What that man did may have hurt you, but his shadow has hurt me. And I don’t want to be him. I don’t want to beat him. I don’t want to fill his shoes. I just want to be the man you’re not afraid to choose.