Dad pooped his pants (and now we can't breathe)
classical, soft rockLyrics
[Verse 1 – Jack singing]
We were just chillin’, after school hangin’
Then we got the text — “Come quick, I’m stankin’”
It’s Dad, oh no, what did he do?
Theo said, “Bro, I think it's number two!”
[Verse 2 – Theo singing]
We rushed to the office, held our nose tight
Something was wrong, and it sure wasn’t right
Dad was in the corner, lookin’ all sad
We sniffed once and shouted, “OH DANG, THAT’S BAD!”
[Chorus – Both]
Spencer pooped his pants at work
Now the whole place smells berserk
Even the boss ran out the door
Someone sprayed Febreze on the floor
Jack’s got goggles, Theo’s got fans
Tryna survive Dad’s stinky pants
He’s our hero, but oh good grief
This smell might end our family tree
[Verse 3 – Spencer's part]
I was in a meeting, tryin’ to present
Then my tummy growled with evil intent
One wrong cough, then I knew the truth
My pants betrayed me, I lost my youth
[Verse 4 – Jack and Theo]
We love you, Dad, but man oh man
This is worse than a burnt-out frying pan
Next time maybe keep a spare
Or tell the burritos to beware
[Chorus – Both]
Spencer pooped his pants at work
Now the whole place smells berserk
HR left, and Karen cried
Even the plants have sorta died
Jack’s got a clothespin, Theo’s got spray
We’re tryna help Dad save the day
He’s our hero, but oh dear me
That stink has reached another degree
[Bridge – Synth solo with echo lines]
“Code brown! Emergency town!”
“Get the mop! Someone shut it down!”
“Dad we love you, but this ain’t fine…”
“Your pants committed a serious crime!”
[Final Chorus – All together]
Spencer pooped his pants at work
Now the story's gone berserk
We’ll laugh forever, hold our breath
Remember the day we smelled near-death
Jack and Theo still got your back
Even if your shorts went totally whack
You're our Dad, but next time please
Keep it in 'til you find some leaves!
[Outro – fading voice with echo]
...Dad, maybe… bring extra underwear next time…
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