
I thought this year would be the best,
Surrounded by six â forget the rest.
My ride-or-dies, or so I assumed,
But they flipped the script, and now I'm fumed.
It was a cold and hungry night,
Post-championship, feelinâ right.
I needed food, my stomach cried,
Heard there was nacho cheese inside.
A tub of gold? Too good to be true,
My mouth said âsip,â my brain said âcue.â
'Cause who just leaves a nacho lake?
Somethingâs off â itâs clearly fake.
Now six suspects, each with charm,
But deep down? They mean you harm.
Madeline Tinskey, sweet on the face,
But that girlâs lying all over the place.
Sheâs got the Catholic look, the charm, the glow,
But trust her? Nah â thatâs a âno.â
Alex is next, full of spite,
Heâll roast you wrong, then claim heâs right.
Heâs got the farts, heâs got the sass,
Heâll sit on your face and gas your class.
Xavier Heller â tall and thin,
You think heâs cool 'til you let him in.
He walks like heâs chill, talks with some grace,
But he kinda just looks like your mom in the face.
Olivia Wiley, all bubbly and smiley,
But donât let that fool you â sheâs really quite wily.
Sheâll snack on your chips and then your whole drawer
Sheâs hungry as heck and she donât give a peck
Castle Dettinger, kitchen king,
But the stuff he cooks is a creepy thing.
He doesnât bake bread, doesnât fry fish â
He cooks up freshmen like itâs his wish.
With spice and dice and evil glee,
Run, little ones, or youâll be his tea.
(Heâs sad now too, loveâs taken its toll,
His Catholic girlfriend took his soul.)
Then thereâs Aleya, sweet little dove,
But sheâs got that fake âbestieâ love.
Sheâll smile, nod, say âI got your back,â
Then gaslight you into a panic attack.
She's just like Maddie â looks so kind,
But sheâs scheminâ behind that sweet girl mind.
So listen up, RAs, yeah I saw the twist,
You thought it was clever â Iâm legit pissed.
Donât pull that again, not once or twice,
Or youâll learn the hard way, I donât play nice.
I fell for your trick, I admit with some sorrow,
But mess with me once â regret tomorrow.
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