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Dark horror-comedy, discordant piano , sinister female vocals, eerie

Lyrics



(sing to the tune of "Jingle Bells")



I heard a reindeer hoof, then Santa dressed in red,

came crashing thro' the roof and landed on my bed.

I thought it was a dream, but quickly did I wake,

as soon as I heard Santa scream, "I want a piece of cake!"



CHORUS

Oh, Santa Claus, Santa Claus, you are much too fat;

I was sleeping peacefully but now my bed is flat. Oh!

Santa Claus, Santa Claus, how much do you weigh?

I'm glad I'm not a reindeer that has to pull your sleigh!



He got up off the floor and said, "How do you do?"

I said, "My back is sore, my head is black and blue."

"So sorry!" he replied, and then he asked my name.

He offered me a ride, I said, "No, thank you just the same!"



CHORUS



I heard a "ho, ho, ho," the sleigh was in the sky.

but it was moving slow and wasn't very high.

It wobbled in the air, I hoped it wouldn't fall;

Said Santa, chewing cookies, "Merry Christmas, one and all!"

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Dark horror-comedy, discordant piano , sinister female vocals, eerie

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