Lyrics

(Verse 1)
I was hiking through the pines, snackin’ on some beef jerky,
Thought I saw a bear, but that thing moved too quirky.
It had size 32s and a glare like doom—
Next thing I know, I’m airborne, boom!

(Chorus)
Bigfoot caught me slippin’, I tried to flee,
But he donkey-kicked my soul right outta me.
Now I’m limpin’ through the forest with a black eye bruise,
Singin’ these Bigfoot Beatdown Blues.

(Verse 2)
He dropkicked my backpack, snapped my selfie stick,
Then he moonwalked off like some cryptid slick.
I begged him, “Bro, let’s talk it out!”
But he just growled and tossed me like a Boy Scout.

(Chorus)
Bigfoot ain’t fuckin fuzzy, he’s a fury-filled brute,
Swung me by my hoodie like a woodland flute.
I lost my shoe, my pride, and my left front tooth,
Now I’m singin’ these Bigfoot Beatdown Blues.

(Bridge)
Should’ve stayed on the trail, brought a bell or a flare,
Not runnin’ through the woods yellin’ “Yo, Bigfoot, where?!”
He didn’t like the tone, didn’t like the sass,
Now my spine’s in a knot and I’m eatin’ grass.

(Final Chorus)
Bigfoot’s real, and he’s got them hands,
Gave me a wedgie and wrecked my plans.
I ain’t huntin’ legends, I’ve learned my cues,
Just stuck singin’ these Bigfoot Beatdown Blues…
Oh Lord, these Bigfoot Beatdown Bluuueeees!