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Tyler, the online mystery

Count, country, easy listening

Lyrics

Verse 1
Tyler met Thor on a dating app
Swiped right once – and fell in the trap
But they’ve never met, not face to face
Still we’re all a bit weirded out by this case.

Verse 2
Thor’s got standards, he’s no fool
But Tyler plays the “funny guy” rule
Speaks no Norwegian, not even close
He only knows the king’s name… that’s his boast.

Chorus
🎵 Is he real? Or just a glitch?
He’s got dandruff like a snowstorm witch
He’s got manboobs, a tight foreskin too
And every joke we tell? He thinks it’s true
What’s he hiding down there, we fear the worst
Is he wiping properly, or about to burst?
Can he spell? Or just hum along?
Is he a serial killer… or just plain wrong?

Verse 3
He’s sensitive – that’s crystal clear
We tease, he sulks for half a year
He writes essays when we make a pun
Like a Discord mod without the fun.

Verse 4
And oh, that scalp! It flakes with pride
It’s July, but snow’s falling from his side
We tried shampoo tips, even Head & Shoulders
But his head’s still whiter than Norway’s boulders.

Chorus
🎵 Is he real? Or some kind of bot?
Flaky scalp and emotional rot?
Does he know the alphabet? Maybe just “A”?
Is Tyler okay, or should we all pray?
He’s funny – sure – but not quite right
A petty girl trapped in a gamer’s plight
We ask ourselves: what lies beneath?
His foreskin’s hiding secrets… like a sheath.

Bridge
We don’t mean to be rude, just deeply afraid
Of what kind of creature Tinder has made
He replies with memes, no real facts
We wonder if he sleeps in socks and slacks?

Outro
So Thor, dear Thor, take our plea
Tyler might not be who he claims to be
He could be sweet, or totally unhinged
But we won’t sniff his boxers – not even fringed.

🎵 Tyler, oh Tyler – a digital dread
Are you real, or just messed in the head? 🎵

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Tyler, the online mystery

Count, country, easy listening

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