Lyrics

[Verse 1]
Well I was sippin’ sweet tea on a warm spring night,
Scrollin’ through TikTok, gettin’ brain rot right
Then who do I see, with grease on his chin?
That’s Nova Online—yep, it’s that fuckin’ guy again.

Talkin’ 'bout women, but can’t get it up,
Got a limp-ass noodle and a church-ban cup
Says he’s “alpha,” more like sad lil’ worm,
With a beard made of grease and a brain full o’ sperm.

[Chorus]
So saddle up, cowboy, ride that L,
You’re a one-man cringe with a Wi-Fi smell
From the Discord creepin’ to your TikTok shame,
You’re the Walmart version of internet fame.

You got ED, can’t pee straight,
Flexin' like you deadlift milk crates
Ain’t no stud, just a keyboard frog,
Nova Online—TikTok's corn-fed hog.

[Verse 2]
You got kicked outta church, yeah, the pastor said “nope,”
Even Jesus ain't got time for that slippery slope
Tryna thirst trap with them pit-stained shirts,
Lookin’ like a bootleg Hulk with tummy that hurts.

You cry on live, beg for cash,
While eatin’ Wingstop like it’s gourmet trash
You say it’s “bulking,” but damn, my dude—
You ain't got gains, just attitude.

[Bridge – Spoken Word Breakdown]
(Spoken with twang)
He said, “I’m misunderstood.”
Boy, you misunderstood how pants work.
You ain’t canceled. You just bad at bein’ a person.
Hell, even the raccoons in your alley won’t claim ya.

[Final Chorus]
So giddy up, Nova, your ride’s done broke
Your saddle’s made of simps and your career’s a joke
TikTok cowboy, banned and bruised,
Even your shadow's out here feelin' used.

No girls, no job, no clout, no wood,
Just a crusty-ass phone and a bucket of food
So here's a toast to your big ol’ fall—
Nova Online, the joke of us all.

[Outro – Fiddle Fade]
(whistling fades out with fiddle)
Yeehaw, motherfucker. Log off.