A Pole Carrier With Moles
Kid's Songs, acoustic guitar, female vocals, banjo, cowbell, live audience recordingLyrics
"HIIIIIIIIIIII-EEEEEEEYUH!!.. HELLURRLL, EVERWINNNN!! IS-... IS THEYAAAAH-... OW!!! Sorry... God electrocuted me. AGAINNNRR!.. Fucking AASSSSHOOOOOLLLLE!!!!!.... OHHHHWUH!! HEEEEYYY!!! Uummm... qaààààAAAAAGGH!!! Oh! Izzurrrr any KIDS out thurr duh-nayeeet?!.."
("YES! WE ARE ALL KIDS!")
"ALRIGHT!!! Wellllllll, FUCK YOUUUUUU!!!! YOU'RE AAALLLLL A BNUCH UHVVV PUSSY-CRIPPLING DEEEEMONS, YOU STUPID, SELFISH FAAAAGS!!!! Okay! Ready fer a song, vadge-manglers?.. Well, I DON'T FUCKING CAAAAARE IF YOU IS OR IF YOU ZIZ-.. ZUZ-... UH-Zuh-.... IF YOU AIN'T, FUCK-TARDS!!.. THIS ONES OL GRRRRADDUH VIZZTOCKLUH!!.. No... OH!! OH!!!.. IZZZ CAAALLLLLED ANUS PINCHERS!!!!
Now, FUCK AALLLL
("WHAT?!!!")
"AAAWWWW, FUCK YOU, you PROGERIA-LOOKIN' AAASSSHOOOLE FUCKS!!!!! ONE, TWO THREE, FOWR!!!!!"-
Everybody's doing the Janitor Dance!
How do you do it? Well, I'll tell you how:
First, you have to be outside,
Make sure you're on the asphalt, and near a gutter.
Now, before I tell you how to do this dance,
I need to tell you all the story about President Shit!
President Shit was a twit, born with a penis that had zits!
He used the Lava Soap on it, and that just scratched it to bits!
President Shit liked the meanest gazelles,
He'd invite them to his birthday parties - said they were swell!
Hey would throw rubber rocks at the mice in the sky!
Man, he was really my kinda guy!
One day, President Shit was four years old.
He just got back from the doctor's, 'cause his mom had found him talking to worms.
The doctor told her that he really wasn't normal,
Told her the best thing to do was go home, grab the gun, and put him down like he was a lame horse.
Oooohhh, everyone gets a sixth chance at life.
Behbehbehbehbehbehbehbeh, how dense is your pudding?
Oooooaaaaaahhh, the clown with no bones likes whacky berries.
Wahwuhwuhwuhwahwuhwuhwuh, take a lamp to the hairbrush store.
SWOLLEN OATMEAL!!
DIVIDED TOOTH DUST!!
HAPPY MOON DINOSAUR!!
FRYING PAN RAILROAD!!
FUUUUUCK, YYYYEEAAAAAAH!!!!!
Bee-bee-bobby-bobby!
Bee-bee-bobby-bobby!
Bee-bee-bobby-bobby!
Bee-bee-bobby-bobby!
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A Pole Carrier With Moles
Kid's Songs, acoustic guitar, female vocals, banjo, cowbell, live audience recording