Stupid O' Clock

Upbeat, humorous country blues and rockabilly, 116 BPM. Deep, rough, gravelly male bass voice with rich subharmonics, strong character and a cheeky, sarcastic British delivery. Natural, expressive vocals with clear pronunciation, playful frustration and comic timing. Fast, lively fingerpicked banjo, twangy electric country guitar, cheeky blues harmonica, walking double bass and punchy drums with a swinging shuffle rhythm. Strong, catchy melody with a foot-tapping, infectious beat. Verses should feel conversational and storytelling, building frustration with each alarm clock. Big, energetic, memorable choruses with powerful gravelly bass vocals and a full, bouncing country band. Spoken introduction delivered in a tired, sarcastic voice. Slow the music during the spoken bridge, allowing comic pauses before the punchline. Add subtle alarm clock sound effects where appropriate. Final chorus louder, faster-feeling and more energetic, with lively banjo and Harmonica end flourish.

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歌词

[Intro – Spoken, deep gravelly voice] "Five days a week I can't get out of bed... Two days off, I can't bloody stay in it! Somebody explain that one to me..." [Verse 1] It's five in the morning, my eyes open wide, The alarm's still an hour away, I roll myself over, pull the blankets up tight, But my brain's got a whole lot to say. I count a few sheep, then a hundred or more, Try dreaming of somewhere serene, But my bladder pipes up from somewhere below, "Get up, mate! You know what I mean!" [Verse 2] I tell myself, "No, I've an hour to go," And snuggle back into my bed, But a voice from my bladder says, "No, you're not!" "There's a toilet needs visiting instead!" I stumble along in the cold morning air, With my eyes barely open to see, Then crawl back to bed with a satisfied sigh, And discover it's now half past five! [Chorus] Oh, stupid-o-clock, here we go again, Fighting with the morning like a battle I can't win! Three goddamn alarms, fifteen minutes apart, And I hate every one from the depths of my heart! I just want an hour, maybe two if I'm blessed, But the working man is wicked, the wicked get no rest! Oh, stupid-o-clock, I hate you, don't let my bladder strain, but I'll guarantee tomorrow, we'll do it all again! [Verse 3] The first alarm rings, Then bury my head out of sight, The second one dings, I swear at the thing, "I'm not getting up, not without a fight!" The third one goes off like a fire alarm, And I'm cursing the damn phone as i hit it with an arm, I crawl from the bed like a half-dead old man, With one eye closed, a runny nose, it's time to face the dawn! [Verse 4] I stagger downstairs for a coffee or two, With a face like a bulldog in pain, My boots feel like lead and my body's half dead, And I'm longing for my bed once again. I climb in the car and I turn up the heat, With a yawn that could swallow a train, And all of a sudden, now it's time to go to work, I could sleep for a fortnight again! [Chorus] Oh, stupid-o-clock, here we go again, Fighting with the morning like a battle I can't win! Three goddamn alarms, fifteen minutes apart, And I hate every one from the depths of my heart! I just want an hour, maybe two if I'm blessed, But the working man is wicked, the wicked get no rest! Oh, stupid-o-clock, I hate you, don't let my bladder strain, but I'll guarantee tomorrow, we'll do it all again! [Bridge – Slower, spoken with sarcastic humour] "Now here's the bit I don't understand... Monday to Friday, getting up's a real nightmare. But Saturday morning? No alarm... No work... No reason on God's green earth to get up..." [Pause] "AND I'M WIDE AWAKE AT FIVE!" [Verse 5] It's Saturday morning, no reason to rise, No boss and no alarm clock to obey, But my eyes spring open wide at stupid-o-clock, On the only goddamn mornings I could stay! I toss and I turn, but there's no going back, So I lie there and stare at the wall, Then Sunday arrives and the same thing occurs, It's the cruellest goddamn joke of em' all! [Final Chorus – Faster, full band] Oh, stupid-o-clock, here we go again, Fighting with the morning like a battle I can't win! Three goddamn alarms, fifteen minutes apart, And I hate every one from the depths of my heart! I just want an hour, maybe two if I'm blessed, But the working man is wicked, the wicked get no rest! Oh, stupid-o-clock, I hate you, don't let my bladder strain, but I'll guarantee tomorrow, we'll do it all again! [Outro – harmonica and banjo][End]