The Dog Is Talking

Lyrics

[Verse 1] I am Buster, I’m a golden retriever I look real innocent, a total believer You think I’m resting when I’m lying on the floor I’m planning how to break into the refrigerator door I understand every single word you say When you ask "who's a good boy?" I just wanna say, "Hey! It is me, obviously, now drop the sausage slice Or the rug gets it, buddy, don't make me ask twice!" [Chorus] Oh, the dog is talking, yes I finally spoke! Thought I only knew how to bark? What a joke! I want bacon, I want cheese, I want your whole plate And stop putting me in sweaters, it’s a lifestyle I hate! Yeah, I’m a talking dog, clear the living room floor Now throw the tennis ball, then open the front door! [Verse 2] The mailman is a villain, he's a secret agent spy He comes to the porch every day at one PM, why? I bark to save your life, I’m a hero in disguise And the vacuum cleaner monster has evil flashing eyes Also, while we're talking, let me make one thing clear The cat is a mastermind, a phantom of fear She’s judging you constantly, I see it in her eyes At least when I slobber, I don't compromise! [Chorus] Oh, the dog is talking, yes I finally spoke! Thought I only knew how to bark? What a joke! I want bacon, I want cheese, I want your whole plate And stop putting me in sweaters, it’s a lifestyle I hate! Yeah, I’m a talking dog, clear the living room floor Now throw the tennis ball, then open the front door! [Bridge] [Tempo shift, theatrical breakdown] You left the room for two minutes, I thought you were dead! I ate a sock, I ate a shoe, I slept on your bed! I regret nothing! Nothing, do you hear?! Now pass the peanut butter, let's make it real clear! [Guitar Solo - playful, fast, upbeat] [Chorus] Oh, the dog is talking, yes I finally spoke! Thought I only knew how to bark? What a joke! I want bacon, I want cheese, I want your whole plate And stop putting me in sweaters, it’s a lifestyle I hate! Yeah, I’m a talking dog, clear the living room floor Now throw the tennis ball, then open the front door! [Outro] Arf! I mean... thanks for listening. Now hand over the treat. Good human. [Barking sound effect fade out]