Big Paul Skenes
Apocalyptic, rock, singing, medieval, male voiceLyrics
[INTRO]
I’m a baseball owner who needs to sell something.
Bob Nutting is my name, and the Pirates are my team.
[VERSE 1]
New concession items were a big no go,
The renegade dog looked like a diseased big toe,
There was a guy in the minors to see
Let's bring him up and maybe sell every seat.
[CHORUS]
Oh Paul, the big stash Skeens
Maybe the fans will finally forgive me
Oh Paul, the big Paul Skeens
Throwing one hundred miles per hour at the knees.
[VERSE 2]
The hitting has been abysmal.
But firing the hitting coach would mean adding to payroll.
We can’t take that hit to the financials.
Maybe bring up the pitcher with the biggest balls.
[CHORUS]
Oh yes, that will sell some tickets
The biggest deal since Kenny Pickett
Oh Paul, the big Paul Skeens
Throwing one hundred miles per hour at the knees.
[BRIDGE]
Pierogi races and ice cream is fun,
But I’d give anything to see the Pirates score a run.
I shouldn’t have let the team fall apart after twenty fifteen,
I desperately need something to try and redeem me.
[CHORUS]
Oh Paul, the big stash Skeens
Maybe the fans will finally forgive me
Oh Paul, the big Paul Skeens
Throwing one hundred miles per hour at the knees.
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