The Call Taker's Anthem

Lyrics

I am the very model of an Ambulance Call Taker, I handle ProQA and MPDS like a navigator, I ask for towns and suburbs and the exact location’s key, I geolocate with AML, my skill is plain for all to see. I log the incident with codes like /VE and /PC, And document the patient's state, from breathing down to LOC, With questions finely tuned to find the protocol that's best, I categorise emergencies with wisdom and with zest. (Chorus) He categorises emergencies with wisdom and with zest, He categorises emergencies with wisdom and with zest, He categorises emergencies with wisdom and with zest, He asks his questions sharply, never gives his mind a rest. --- I gather patient info from their consciousness to pain, And if it’s critical, I guide through CPR to ease the strain, From seizures to a stroke, I know the right PAIs to give, And make sure help arrives so every patient’s sure to live. For urgent situations, I provide the clearest ETA, And check dispatch to see when crews will be on their way, With ProQA I switch from chest pain to a breathing bout, And manage stress while ensuring nothing crucial’s left out. (Chorus) He manages the stress while ensuring nothing’s left out, He manages the stress while ensuring nothing’s left out, He manages the stress while ensuring nothing’s left out, A master of the protocol, there’s never any doubt. --- So if you’ve got an emergency, don't panic or delay, Call up the service, I’ll handle it all the call taker’s way, With MPDS and ProQA, I am never caught unaware, For I’m the very model of a Call Taker prepared with care. (Chorus) Yes, he’s the very model of a Call Taker prepared with care, Yes, he’s the very model of a Call Taker prepared with care, Yes, he’s the very model of a Call Taker prepared with care, He handles each emergency and does it all with flair!