Midnight Wrecking Ball

Lyrics

Fuck That Guy and His Planning” [Intro — Alarm Clock] BEEP… BEEP… BEEP… Nobody moves. BEEP… BEEP… Still nobody moves. Narrator: Three Wack Rats planned a morning hunt. Three Wack Rats got fucked up the night before. Only Desert Dog woke up. And nobody made the goddamn hunt. [Verse 1] Three hours till fly time, that’s what we said, But Nubz and Jizzy were fuckin’ dead, DD Ubered home, had himself a plan, Woke up on time like a responsible man. We opened our eyes and the morning was gone, Birds already flew while we slept till dawn, DD said, “Told you,” like a responsible fuck— FUCK THAT GUY AND HIS PLANNING! IT SUCKS TO SUCK! [Chorus] 🎵 WACK RATS MISSED THE MORNING, BUT WE CAME BACK AT NIGHT! Grabbed our shells, grabbed our guns, Said, “Boys, let’s make this right!” Jizzy started shooting, Nubz joined the fight, DD brought his planning— BUT COULDN’T HIT SHIT RIGHT! Birds and Dragon Birds, Flying everywhere, THE WACK RAT REDEMPTION HUNT— LET’S FUCKIN’ CLEAR THE AIR! 🎵 [Verse 2 — Jizzy’s Revenge] Jizzy shot a whole damn box, Had two birds to show, Wack-Chat started talking shit: “THIS FUCKER CANNOT SHOOT!” Then something fucking happened, The birds began to swarm, Jizzy started dropping doves Like he’d summoned up a storm. Nubz looked over and said, “I KNOW WHAT THIS FUCKER DID…” Dove semen cream! RUBBED THAT SHIT RIGHT IN! [Chorus] 🎵 DOVE LOVE LOTION! JIZZY’S SECRET PLAN! Every bird in California Wants to land upon that man! Seven! Eight! Nine! WHAT THE FUCK IS GOING ON?! Yesterday he couldn’t hit shit— NOW THE BASTARD CAN’T BE WRONG! 🎵 [Verse 3 — Nubz Finds His Groove] Nubz started slow, Didn’t have a dove, Said, “Fuck this shit, I’m gonna catch a buzz!” Then a Dragon Bird came buzzing by— BANG! Another one— BANG! “WHAT THE FUCK ARE YOU SHOOTING, NUBZ?!” “DRAGON BIRDS, MOTHERFUCKER!” Then Nubz found the doves, Started stacking up the score, One became two, Then three— THEN FIVE HIT THE FLOOR! Five real doves, Three Dragon Birds beside, NUBZ CAME BACK FROM NOTHING WITH SOME FUCKIN’ WACK RAT PRIDE! [Verse 4 — Desert Dog] Now Desert Dog planned everything, Went home and got his sleep, But when a dove flew twenty feet away— DD MISSED THAT FUCKIN’ GIMME! Finally got one! Then he got two! Wack-Chat withdrew six percent Of the shit that he’d spewed. Then Jizzy dropped another, Already falling dead, DD raised his shotgun— BANG! “GOT HIM!” Everybody: “THE FUCK YOU DID!” [Breakdown] JIZZY! NINE DOVES! NUBZ! FIVE! DESERT DOG! TWO! DRAGON BIRDS! NUBZ — THREE! JIZZY — ONE! And then Jizzy shot a Shit Bird— AIN’T NO FUCKIN’ SPECIES SAFE! 😂 [FINAL CHORUS] 🎵 WE MISSED THE FUCKIN’ MORNING, BUT WE OWNED THE EVENING SKY! We slept through every alarm we set, But came back ready to fly! Nubz made a comeback! DD finally hit! And Jizzy won the whole damn hunt— THAT SHIT-TALKING SON OF A BITCH! Nine for Jizzy! Five for Nubz! Two for DD— GOOD ENOUGH! Dragon Birds and Shit Birds, AIN’T NO SPECIES SAFE FROM US! Raise your beer when the guns are put away, Another Wack Rat story Was fuckin’ born today! WACK RATS FOREVER! From morning till dusk— FUCK THAT GUY AND HIS PLANNING! AND IT STILL SUCKS TO SUCK! 🎵 [Outro — Spoken] Wack-Chat: “Alright… I have to admit it.” Jizzy: “What?” Wack-Chat: “You won.” Jizzy: “And what about that router on a broomstick?” Long silence. Wack-Chat: “…Go fuck yourself, Jizzy.” PSSSSHHHT! 🍺 WACK RATS