Paint it Black

Lyrics

I saw a clean lab, I had to paint it black, No QC anymore, I want the staff to slack. The Levey-Jennings drifting, nobody seems to care, The charts are heading off the scale, but no one's even there. The calibrations flashing red, we simply click "OK," The duty biochem keeps calling, but we look the other way. Infinity is crying, the filters overflow, But if the queue keeps moving, then nobody needs to know. I want the BRFs all jammed from one through five today, The AOB keeps beeping, but we'll just walk away. The reagent packs are empty, the QC's overdue, Yet somehow every sample still gets validated through. No Westgard rules to worry about, they're much too hard to read, Just push another patient through with maximum speed. The SD Index climbing, the CV's getting high, We'll blame another reagent lot and never ask it why. The bile acids are drifting with that sawtooth every day, Three calibrations later and they've wandered far away. The Line 3 mask is gone now, the samples flood the rack, I saw a good lab once... I had to paint it black. The SOPs are gathering dust upon the office shelf, Competencies complete themselves by copying someone else. The analysers keep on screaming, every warning's stacked, I saw a good lab once... I had to paint it black. I don't want perfect standards, I don't want quality, No QC anymore, just endless apathy. Let every chart keep drifting, let every audit crack, I saw a good lab once... I had to paint it black. I saw a good lab standing proud before it lost its track, No QC anymore, I want the staff to slack. The Levey-Jennings fading, the standards all collapse, I saw a good lab once... I had to paint it black.