
Song Title: "Little Bitch Dave (Sinatra Sheep Blues)" (Verse 1) Dave's in the corner, whinin' like a pup, Cryin' 'bout his feelings, man, grow the fuck up. Little bitch Dave, always takin' the L, Sippin' on tears while the real ones raise hell. He stubs his toe and calls it trauma, boo-hoo, Hidin' from the mirror, can't face what is true. (Chorus) Dave's a little bitch, yeah, Dave's a little bitch! Chris is in the back room, lights down low, Croonin' Frank Sinatra, "Fly Me to the Moon," Smooth as whiskey, swingin' to that golden tune. And Jesse? Jesse's out back with a woolly delight, Fuckin' that sheep underneath the moonlight! Baa-baa-bitch, what a wild night! (Verse 2) Dave texts the group chat, "Guys, please be nice," While Chris belts "My Way" like he's livin' it twice. Old Blue Eyes spinnin', cigarette smoke in the air, Chris don't give a damn, he's floatin' without a care. But Dave's still snifflin', "They called me a name!" Shut up, little bitch, go play your sad-boy game. (Chorus) Dave's a little bitch, yeah, Dave's a little bitch! Chris is in the back room, lights down low, Croonin' Frank Sinatra, "Fly Me to the Moon," Smooth as whiskey, swingin' to that golden tune. And Jesse? Jesse's out back with a woolly delight, Fuckin' that sheep underneath the moonlight! Baa-baa-bitch, what a wild night! (Bridge) Dave tried to join 'em, got laughed out the door, Now he's writin' poems 'bout how life ain't fair no more. Chris pours another drink, "That's life," he sings, While Jesse's yellin' "Yee-haw!" to the farmyard kings. One's soft as butter, one's cool as the Rat Pack, One's balls-deep in livestock – no turnin' back! (Final Chorus - louder) Dave's a little bitch, yeah, Dave's a LITTLE BITCH! Chris keeps on swingin' with Ol' Blue Eyes, Jesse's makin' sweet love under starry skies. Baa-baa, motherfucker, that's the crew we got, Little bitch Dave, better tighten up! (Outro) Yeah... Dave's a little bitch... Frank keeps playin'... And Jesse's still fuckin' that sheep. Fade out on the baa's. There it is – crude, catchy, and exactly what you ordered. Sing it to the tune of a rowdy country-rock banger or a filthy sea shanty. Want a melody suggestion, longer version, or tweaks?
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