Just you Chris

Lyrics

(Verse 1) Chris, if I don't answer, don't assume the worst, I might be feeding giraffes or dying of thirst. Could be wrestling penguins down at the zoo, But every single penguin reminds me of you. I could be halfway up Mount Everest, Fighting for oxygen, looking my best. Sherpas all shouting, "Don't look down, miss!" And I'm screaming back, "BUT I LOVE CHRIS!" (Chorus) There's no one else but you, Chris, No matter what ridiculous thing I do, Chris. Whether I'm shaving my bush in the garden at noon, Or accidentally getting arrested by a baboon. You're the one I think of night and day, Never a thought of you goes away. While walking the dog, feeding the cat, Doing backflips in a giant sombrero hat. There's no one else, not even a little, Not even if Ryan Gosling played the fiddle. Not even if Thor turned up for a kiss, I'd say, "Sorry mate, I'm thinking of Chris." (Verse 2) If I miss your text, don't start to panic, I might be stuck in a kayak in the Atlantic. Or teaching alpacas to ballroom dance, While they all wear sequins and tiny trousers from France. Could be skydiving over Peru, Yelling "WOOHOO!" then "I MISS YOU!" The instructor says, "Pull the cord, don't delay!" I say, "After I've texted Chris back, okay?" (Chorus) There's no one else but you, Chris, Even when life gets completely amiss. Whether I'm cleaning the gutters or trimming a hedge, Or dangling upside down from the side of a ledge. You're the one I think of night and day, Never a thought of you goes away. While brushing my teeth or hoovering dust, Or attempting yoga and pulling a glute muscle bust. There's no one else, not one tiny bit, Not even if I won the lottery jackpot. I'd buy a mansion, a yacht and some fish, Then immediately spend it all talking to Chris. (Bridge) If aliens landed and took me to Mars, I'd carve your name into all of their cars. If Bigfoot proposed with a diamond ring, I'd say, "Sorry mate, Chris is my thing." If I became Queen and sat on a throne, I'd still check my phone when I got home. The royal guards would all be dismissed, Because I'd be too busy texting Chris. (Final Chorus) There's no one else but you, Chris, You're the world's most magnificent risk. Whether I'm climbing a mountain or stuck in a tree, Or fighting a goose that's attacking me. You're the one I think of night and day, Never a thought of you goes away. While walking the dog, feeding the cat, Juggling potatoes and doing acrobats. So if I'm quiet, don't take offence, The reason is probably completely immense. But wherever I am, just know this: I'm probably doing something stupid... But I'm still thinking about Chris.