Jitterbug Kettle

Lyrics

[Intro] Well, gather round, I’ve got a tale to tell, About a fellow who could trip over a bell. [Verse 1] Mister Benny bought a brand-new hat, Tipped it to a pigeon, and it tipped him back. He took his girl to dinner, trying to look refined, But wore his napkin proudly like a necktie of the finest kind. [Chorus] Oh, Benny, Benny, what a way to go, You’re the only man who loses to a toe! You bow to the waiter, salute the chair, Then chase your own umbrella halfway down the square. Oh, Benny, Benny, keep that grin in place, The world may laugh, but you’re winning the race! [Verse 2] He joined a fancy club to learn the fox-trot step, But every time the music played, he took a little nap. The band struck up a tango, he marched into the punch, Then blamed the chandelier for giving him a hunch. [Bridge] He said, “I’m smooth as butter, I’m graceful as a swan!” Then sat upon a birthday cake and carried on. The candles all applauded, the baker laughed with glee, And Benny took a bow beneath the frosting sea. [Chorus] Oh, Benny, Benny, what a way to go, You’re the only man who loses to a toe! You bow to the waiter, salute the chair, Then chase your own umbrella halfway down the square. Oh, Benny, Benny, keep that grin in place, The world may laugh, but you’re winning the race! [Instrumental] [Outro] So if you see him coming, kindly clear the floor, He’s got a brand-new hat and three left feet galore. He’ll stumble into glory with a whistle and a grin— That’s Benny’s secret weapon: he falls, but calls it a win!