The prophecy of Chew final

Lyrics

*calm intro guitar instrumental 10 seconds* We all know the story of the man named Chew, but do you know the story of the prophecy of Chew? *Verse* *Upbeat full band instrumental 10 seconds* One fateful day, chew was late to an interview he was supposed to be in He walked in the door during the interview Tom threw a stapler at his head, knocking him out Chew's life flashed before his eyes he watched himself perform all the stupid ideas he came up with And suddenly he woke up in heaven *Pre chorus* Chew looked around and laid his eyes on god They began to speak but only 5 minutes into the conversation god said *Chorus* Please please make it stop Someone silence this slob Please please take him away He don't belong here anyway *Instrumental 10 seconds* *Verse* As god finished speaking chew was surrounded by angels to escort him away but they couldn't stand him *Pre chorus* The angels begged for their misery to end as their skin started to melt away *Chorus* Please please end our despair They screamed as they pull out their hair We can't stand this fool If only murder was allowed in heaven *Bridge* Enough of this bullshit, god said as the angels died of misery Chew watched as the ground around him melted away and opened a screaming portal to hell as he got sucked into damnation *Guitar solo* *Verse* Chew fell for hours and suddenly fell face first into a flaming pit of hell *Pre chorus* Right before he hit the ground the devil cought him in his hand... The devil said, I'll make you a deal I just got my ass kicked in a fiddle contest by some kid and lost my golden fiddle. If you can beat me in a fiddle contest I'll send you back to life on earth Chew accepted his challenge and the devil began to play *Fiddle solo* Chew sat in disbelief. Wondering how he's going to win and get home. Chew reluctantly began to play... when only 15 seconds in the devil slapped the fiddle out of his hand *Chorus* Please please make it stop Holy shit you fucking suck I'd rather die than listen to that slop I can't stand to hear it As chew began to beg for mercy with his shitty inaudible bullshit the devil cut him off and said... You best believe I'm not leaving you here im sending you back to earth The devil grabbed him and threw him back to his body while yelling, get the fuck out of here and don't come back. *Verse* Chew woke up back in his body with a splitting headache laying in a pool of his own blood... Still missing his toes *Pre chorus* He sat up and saw the interview was over As he stood up he heard the devils voice in his head saying *Chorus* Thank God thank God that the chewster is gone... But I'm not done with him yet. Chew will forever be my servant and vessel of pain and suffering. He will fulfill the prophecy as the next king of hell *Guitar solo* *Drum solo* *Fiddle solo* *Verse* The devil said See chew that's how you play a fiddle you fucking retard *Pre chorus* Tom walked back to the conference room and saw chew alive, he dropped to his knees... and said *Chorus* Please please God take him back I was so excited to have him off my back Please please God smite this dumbass Or Ill get rid of him myself... *Bridge* Tom chased chew the fool around with a Jake Chew ran off to his pos Chevy chews He started to drive away For a brief moment the smoking engine masked his escape But the motor detonated like Hiroshima Chew was vaporized Chew was gone *Pre chorus* Tom walked up to the wreckage All he saw were flames Tom threw his arms to the sky And screamed *Chorus* Thank god thank the chewster is gone I thought my career was done Maybe now we can all have fun *Pre chorus* God was walking through heaven When he saw chew once again Gods smile turned to rage As he set chew a flame God said *Chorus* Fuck no fuck no not him I'm not going through this again You're one stupid man *Bridge* Chew once again fell from heaven As god yelled Begone cunt *Pre chorus* chew fell right back into hell Into the devils palm The devil screamed like a girl And said *Chorus* Fuck no fuck no not his dumbass again Theres no room for you here As he stomped and stomped on chew Then he punted him back to earth *Pre chorus* Tom sat watching the flames In total rejoice Until he saw chew emerge from the fire Tom said *Chorus* Please please kill me now I'm done with this life I can't take anymore