Inter thoughts

Lyrics

🎙️ VOICES IN MY HEAD Melodic pain rap • Southern storytelling • Punchlines, metaphors, similes, double meanings • Slow guitar beat [Intro — , emotional vocals] Sometimes I sit alone and wonder if it's me against the world, Or if the war inside my mind the reason I don't feel like myself no more. Everybody tell me keep going, but they don't hear what I hear… I been smiling in they faces while I'm fighting back these tears. Lord, if You listening, I got something I need to say… Why my mind become the place I fear the most every day? [Verse 1 — Storytelling, punchlines] I got voices in my head, every one got a different opinion, I'm fighting wars inside my mind, but they congratulate my winning. My thoughts a courtroom, every night I'm standing on trial, My past keep taking the stand, bringing up mistakes with a smile. My conscience calling collect, I can't afford to accept, I owe my soul so many apologies, still paying off debt. I wear a smile like a mask, but the straps cutting my face, They see me running up the money, don't see what it take. My mind a prison cell, every thought got a life sentence, I keep asking God for peace, but my pain keep interrupting. I'm my own worst enemy, know my weaknesses by heart, It's hard to put yourself together when you don't know where to start. My memories like broken glass, every step cut my feet, I keep trying to outrun my past, but it's running with me. I got a thousand different feelings that I never let show, Like a house that's full of people but nobody feel home. I done gave advice to everybody when they needed a shoulder, But when life put that weight on me, I just carried it over. I was everybody's umbrella when they walked through the rain, Now I'm standing in a storm, trying to shelter my pain. They say the truth will set you free, why my truth feel like chains? I been searching for some sunshine with a forecast full of rain. I got scars that ain't visible, got wounds that don't close, And the people I call family don't know half of what I hold. [Chorus — Melodic, emotional high notes] I got voices in my head, and they won't let me sleep, Got a war inside my chest that I don't let nobody see. I keep telling everybody that I'm good, but that's a lie, I'm the one who lift them up, who's gon' catch me when I cry? Ohhh, who's gon' catch me when I fall? I been answering everybody, but nobody hear my calls. I been looking for some peace, but my mind won't let me rest, Got a thousand different thoughts fighting battles in my chest. And I don't wanna lose myself, I'm already feeling gone, Been pretending to be strong for everybody way too long. If I tell you what I'm feeling, would you stay or disappear? I'm so tired of fighting battles that nobody knows are here. [Verse 2 — Harder punchlines and metaphors] My head a battlefield, my thoughts don't believe in surrender, Every winter in my soul make me forget about December. I got demons in my ear, they got my history memorized, They can turn a good day tragic just by bringing up my life. My brain got a replay button, stuck on all my worst decisions, I'm serving time for old mistakes without a judge or a conviction. I keep looking for the exit, but the walls keep rearranging, I done prayed to be a new man, why my old self keep returning? I got trust issues so deep, I shake hands with suspicion, Even love look like a setup when you raised around deception. I treat happiness like glass, scared to hold it too tight, 'Cause the last time I felt good, life switched up overnight. My heart got a waiting room, my feelings never get seen, I been sitting with my pain like it's part of the routine. I got bills for my mistakes, every memory collect, And the interest on my trauma keep increasing my debt. I'm a book full of chapters that I'm scared to let 'em read, Got some pages full of pain that I don't want nobody seeing. I put a lock upon my heart, threw the key into the ocean, Now I'm drowning in the water that I created with my emotions. I'm a walking contradiction, want some love but push it back, Want somebody to be real, but I keep expecting them to act. I say I need somebody close, then I disappear for days, It's hard to trust a hand reaching when you got used to being played. I got a PhD in hiding every feeling that I feel, But I'm failing every class when it come to learning how to heal. I know how to make 'em laugh when I'm breaking down inside, I'm a comedian at the funeral of the person I was inside. My thoughts like unpaid actors, every night they take the stage, And my sleep keep missing shifts 'cause my mind work overtime. I been trying to make a future while my past keep pulling strings, I'm the king of looking fine while I'm losing everything. [Pre-Chorus — Piano enters] Tell me, why my mind keep lying when I know the truth? Why I keep on running from the things I need to do? Why I give the world my heart, then got nothing left for me? Why the loudest voice inside is the one I can't make leave?