The Preachers Always Late

Lyrics

[Verse 1] My man's got a sermon and a stolen Bic A head full of facts and a mouth full of tricks He'll tell you how to live before he's found his shoes Then show up forty minutes late with some ridiculous excuse He loves his hair more than a Hollywood queen Knows every damn spaceship that's ever been seen He's got an opinion on the stars above But can't explain the crazy things he does for love [Pre-Chorus] He says, "Now listen, baby" And I already know Here comes another lecture From my favorite one-man show [Chorus] Oh, the Preacher's always late But he sure knows how to make an entrance Steals my lighter, steals my time Then acts like it's a coincidence He's got ink upon his fingers And a devil in his grin He can preach about temptation While he's leading me to sin Oh, he's holy when he's talking And trouble when the lights go dim Lord have mercy on this woman For the things I'd do with him [Verse 2] He says he's got a steady hand Well, honey, that's no joke He knows just where to put a line And how to make me lose my focus His Star Wars and his Star Trek Take up half his brain But when he starts talking dirty I don't mind the entertainment He'll spend an hour making plans And another finding keys I tell him there's a faster way To get down on his knees [Chorus] Oh, the Preacher's always late But he sure knows how to make an entrance Steals my lighter, steals my time Then acts like it's a coincidence He's got ink upon his fingers And a devil in his grin He can preach about temptation While he's leading me to sin [Bridge — Half-Spoken, Teasing] Now baby, I respect your wisdom And your fascinating views But if you're planning one more sermon You better bring some better moves You can talk about the universe The Force and outer space But I prefer the look you get When I pull you closer by the waist [Final Chorus] The Preacher's always late But I know what he's been after He'll steal the fire right from my hand Then light the room with laughter And when the preaching's over And the whole damn world's asleep I've got a few confessions That I'd rather let him keep [Outro] He's late for every appointment But there's one thing I should say If that man's coming over tonight He can take his sweet damn time.