Boogers & Buckets

A 10–15 second unhinged comedy party intro. Begin with a vinyl scratch, rowdy drunken crowd noises, and a chaotic male announcer shouting through a distorted vintage megaphone. Wild, manic, irreverent delivery with exaggerated pauses, crowd heckling, and ridiculous sound effects. Suddenly launch into blistering high-energy psych rockabilly metal with slap upright bass, snarling twangy electric guitars, pounding live drums, and a rowdy barroom party atmosphere. Raw, rebellious, cartoonishly chaotic, profane, and ridiculously fun. Make the transition from spoken intro to full band explosive and immediate.

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Lyrics

[INTRO — DISTORTED MEGAPHONE, CROWD SCREAMING] ALRIGHT, YOU TARDS!!! YOU MAGNIFICENT FUCKIN’ DISASTERS!!! WHO’S GOT TWO BRAINCELLS AND A HALF-EATEN CRAYON?! THAT’S RIGHT! YOU DO CHAMP! IT’S TIME TO GO BONKERS! FLICK YOUR BOOGERS! BONK YOUR BUDDIES! PUNCH GRANNY IN THE TAINT! LET’S FUCKING GOOOOOOOO!!! [SLAP BASS EXPLODES — GUITAR RIFF] [chorus] We came to party (hey hey!!) We came to jam (ho! ho!) We came to tear the building down Smash up the walls Sprint down the halls And punch the elevator in the balls We came to party (hey! hey!) We came to jam (ho! ho!) We’re gonna burn this mother fuckin’ place down and do it all over again! [verse 1] Woke up Tuesday in a shopping cart, Wearing three left shoes and a rail road part, Got a hot dog stuck in the VCR, And a garden gnome driving my car! My buddy ate glue, said it tasted like steak, Tried to fight a duck for a birthday cake, Granny’s on the roof yelling, “CALL THE LAW!” And somebody’s pants just ran out the door! [chorus] We came to party (hey! hey!) We came to jam (ho! ho!) We came to tear the building down Smash up the walls Sprint down the halls And punch the elevator in the balls We came to party (hey! hey!) We came to jam (ho! ho!) We’re gonna burn this mother fuckin’ place down and do it all over again! [VERSE 2] My cousin got arrested by a garden hose, Tried to pay his bail with a bucket of toes, My other buddy’s beefing with a folding chair, Screaming, “SQUARE UP, MOTHERFUCKER, I DON’T CARE!” We put a cowboy hat on a bowl of spaghetti, Taught a possum how to drive a Chevy, The possum hit the gas, took out the shed, Now he’s our manager and we’re all in debt! [chorus] We came to party (hey! hey!) We came to jam (ho! ho!) We came to tear the building down Smash up the walls Sprint down the halls And punch the elevator in the balls We came to party (hey! hey!) We came to jam (ho! ho!) We’re gonna burn this mother fuckin’ place down and do it all over again! [final chorus- twice as loud] We came to party (hey! hey!) We came to jam (ho! ho!) We came to tear the building down Smash up the walls Sprint down the halls And punch the elevator in the balls We came to party (hey! hey!) We came to jam (ho! ho!) We’re gonna burn this mother fuckin’ place down and do it all over again! FUCK!

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