The Age of Two Tantrum

Lyrics

[INTRO – spoken, building up] Now this is a story all about Sim, 21 years and the trouble she’s been in. I’d like to take a minute, so grab your wine, And let me tell you ’bout the girl whose face looks like mine! [VERSE 1 – THE TERRIBLE TWOS] Now from the age of two, Sim was up to no good, A little wild child terrorising the neighbourhood. One small tantrum and the fight was on, I said “NO!” and Simone’s patience was gone! No Mr Poppers Penguins DVD in sight, She punched me with all her might! A two-year-old gangster, as bossy as can be, And her favourite demand? “WHERE’S MY MILKY?!” [VERSE 2 – THE BUTTERFLY CHAMP] Into the pool, little Simi would dive, Swimming butterfly, leaving everyone behind. Under-10 champion, the swimming GOAT, Now she’d rather be sipping Aperols on a boat! [VERSE 3 – THE GIRLS] Mikki, Sof and Erin, the infamous crew, If one gets in trouble, the others are there too. Shaving cream in hand, they thought they were slick, But their masterpiece was just one giant dick! [VERSE 4 – FAMILY BUSINESS] Now let’s talk family, here’s the golden rule, Mess with her siblings and you must be a fool! One night at Mariners, someone messed with Lex, No time for warnings, no time to reflect. One rugby tackle and Simi said, “GOOD FUCKEN NIGHT!” That was the end of that fight! Matt tagging along, like little bros do, Don’t worry, bro, there’s a shot of tequila in it for you! [VERSE 5 – THE LEGENDS] Now Dad’s the GOAT, the man to be reckoned, Bandit… without a doubt, THE LEGEND! [VERSE 6 – THE PARTY YEARS] Simi’s responsible, she knows wrong from right, But put on Macklemore and she’s rapping all night. And then came Rita Ora, trying to steal the scene, Photobombing Simi like some desperate fan queen! Stellies was a jol, until Yorke arrived on scene Things changed….Now sea point is the place to be seen! And just to be clear, if Mikayla was not around This rap would have crumbled to the ground She brought the logic, the lyrics and the humour! Cause believing I can rap is just a rumour! [OUTRO – BIG FINISH] So raise up your glasses, to the queen of the night , Too Simi, may your future be bright! Happy 21st, SIMYYYY! NOW SOMEBODY GIVE THAT GIRL A MILKY!!!